02 June 2008

What I Learned On My Vacation

  • Antigua is a beautiful island. I want to go back. Tomorrow. Please?
  • I really like coconut rum. Really. I think I'm going to start adding it to my morning coffee, my afternoon Diet Coke, and my Cheerios. Yeah.
  • My particular brand of A-positive is quite tasty to Antiguan mosquitoes. Little bitches.
  • Antigua? Wasn't going to be called Antigua. It was going to be Wadadli. Isn't that the coolest word? If Ty-man and I ever get surprised with a 4th offspring? We'll name it Wadadli. Boy or girl. Seriously.
  • Island time? Drives me nuts. Even when I'm on vacation.
  • I could so start driving on the left side of the road. It's cool! I might start doing that this week. Can't catch me, copper!
  • Sandals knows the resort business. Pamper. Spoil. "Would you like another drink, ma'am?" I wanna go back! Wahhhhhhh!
  • Coconut rum punch. Coconut rum runners. Coconut rum Earl Grey tea. Coconut rum bottled water...
  • SPF 30 just isn't enough to keep my pale, white self from getting burnt.
  • Before my next Sandals vacation I need to lose about 15 pounds, not so that I'll look great in a bikini but so that those 15 pounds I gain in the one week on vacation there doesn't faze me.
  • It is possible for Ty-man and I to have meaningful conversations that don't involve talk of children. Or talking over children, for that matter.
  • And? It is possible for us to have sex! After 13 years! Lots!
  • Yum. Coconut rum. Can that be spread on PB&J sandwiches? Would that make it a PBJ&CR sandwich?
  • Even though the cold and flu season traditionally ends April 15th, our kids can and did contract the croup, two with doctor's office/emergency room visits while we were gone.
  • It's possible for me to feel extremely guilty over said incidents and for a family member to make me feel even worse about it once I came home. Um... yeah.
  • Every danged bride, bride-wanna-be, never-gonna-be-a-bride, chick, at that danged resort had a French manicure. Ish. Except for me. Polish-free, baby!
  • Except for my toes. Berry Rich - it's my shade.
  • I'm going to start running/walking again tomorrow, working on that 15-pound loss for the next vacation weight-gain marathon. Who knew coconut rum could be so fattening?
  • DAMN! Coconut rum! Woo hoo!


RiverPoet said...

I loves me some Sandals! I have been wanting to go back every since we went on our St. Lucia jaunt, too. And yes, those little drinky-poos do put the pounds on (that and being able to eat at the little snack bar at 2 in the morning after marathon ...er.... you know.

So glad you had a good time! You look so happy in the picture....Peace - D

Avitable said...

Someone made you feel worse about it when you got back? Recockulous!

The Ferryman said...

I'd like to hear more about the sex...

Gypsy said...

Welcome back! I missed you. And yay for Antigua and YAY for sex!

Miss Britt said...

I used to hate hate hate "island time".

Then I moved to Florida. And now I understand it. :-)

And DITTO what Avitable said!!

Donna said...

Mmmm - sex, rum, sex, rum, no kids, sex, rum, sex GAH! I'm feeling a little jealous!

Welcome back

Anonymous said...

Hey, I want some rum and island time and sex...and rum...oh, and the ability to sleep in after too much rum. Long story and not typical of me on a Monday, but I am SO very hungover today and it s-u-c-k-s!!!!

I can't believe someone made you feel guilty about your kids being sick while you were away. That's awful.

Welcome back :)

Not Afraid To Use It said...

Okay, someone made you feel guilty? A gigantic FUCKOFF to them.

Yes, the "vitamins" they put in your drinks are so. damned. good.

When we lived in Tahoe, everyone referred to "Tahoe Time". I hear you on that one. Good Lord.

Glad you guys got your groove on. May it tide you over until the next vacation. LOL

Anonymous said...


Great contraceptive... that will make all his sperm turn around and run like hell!!! ;-)

Coal Miner's Granddaughter said...

Momma - Oh! Oh! Marathon... what?!? Come on! Tell all girlfriend! :-)

Avitable - Yeah. Recockulous, indeed.

Fab - Well, you were having tons of your own, so I'll tell if you tell. :-)

Gypsy - Missed you, too! :-)

Britt - Seriously? There's Florida time? Is it because of all the old people? Like Avitable? :-)

Donna - Thanks, hon!

MommyCosm - Ooooo, hungover! Do tell! And the guilt trip? Yeah, I was speechless.

NATUI - There's Tahoe Time, too? Maybe Tahoe, Florida, and Antigua are in some kind of time slip. I hear Star Trek theme music in the background...

Dutchbitch - Isn't that great? Better than birth control... :-)

Molly's Mom said...

*Sigh*. Do you detect some jealousy? At least now I have a better idea of where we might go for our 10th, although it won't be this summer...
Glad you guys had a great time!

Miss Britt said...


Is this your first real live troll!?!?!?!

Aren't you supposed to.. like.. have a drink to celebrate or something?!!