10 April 2009

Promiscuous Ammo*

  • Taking your kids to the Atlanta Zoo during spring break is a bad idea. Especially when you get there at 11AM. Because there will be NO PARKING!
  • It is pretty much guaranteed that when you have driven all the way to Atlanta and sat in traffic waiting for non-existent zoo parking to materialize, that your youngest will wet himself and that you will be bent like a pretzel in your minivan, in a BP parking lot, attempting to change his diaper and clothes. And trying really hard not to cuss.
  • After promising your kids a visit to the zoo and then reneging there will be fussing. Until you promise to immediately drive them to Monkey Joe's for 90 minutes of inflatable slide goodness. Is it bad I want my 38th birthday party there?
  • Watching your precious under-4 toddlers is nerve-wracking when you watch them getting bounced around and plowed into by bigger, older kids who aren't paying attention to their surroundings. It's also a lesson in control as you attempt to not strangle said bigger, older kids.
  • Rough-housing on inflatable slides guarantees a 3-hour afternoon kid nap. Ah, bliss.
  • Rough-housing on inflatable slides guarantees three fussy kids after said 3-hour afternoon nap. Go figure.
Hope you all have a lovely Easter weekend! I will be making sweet love to a Cadbury cream egg while my kids hunt for eggs.

*DAMN but I love my thesaurus.


Ashlie- Mommycosm said...

Monkey Joes sounds like a lot of fun. We don't have those around here.

Mmm...Cadbury cream egg...Must.Have.One.

Avitable said...

That sounds like an absolutely miserable day!

Expat No. 3699 said...

Sounds like a fun filled day...for the kids. I'm glad you survived. Have a Hoppy Easter.

Yeah, my thesaurus and Google are my new best friends.

sybil law said...

Happy Easter!!!
(You deserve a break - hide the eggs in the neighboring town!)

Anonymous said...

OK strike my plan to take The Kid to the zoo tomorrow, come to think of it...

Trukindog said...

See this kind a thing is why it's a good thing I'm not a parent cause I wouldn't have thought of Monkey Joes...I woulda just drove to the "shady" part of town & told them we were on an Urban Safari pointing out the rouge pimp & prowling hookers...oh look kids theres a pack of junkies they're the scavengers of the Urban jungle not unlike the Hyena's of Africa.

A Free Man said...

I never thought that a three hour kid nap would be such a source of ecstasy.

Patois42 said...

Yeah, why the hell do we have to pay the price for a three-hour nap?