19 July 2010

Lack of Interest

Last week, I was greeted with an email message from my high school 20-year reunion committee stating that the reunion had been canceled due to lack of interest.

Lack. Of interest.

And I'm not surprised. My high school class was never known for being on top of things. The reunion was scheduled to happen in less than two weeks and we had all been notified of the impending event last August. Lack of interest with ten whole months to plan, buy reunion tickets, take time off from work, book the flight, lose 20 pounds, get Botox, rent a convertible, rent a date, sign up for hair implants, and buy the perfect dress/suit. What this says to me is that most of the class of '90 would rather stay home, or go on summer beach vacations, or do anything at all than spend a weekend with people we either loved or hated two decades ago.

I have to admit, I was part of this "lack of interest." I had been stewing for ten months about whether to go and make a week of it. I haven't been back to my home state in four years and thought I would use the reunion to visit family, meet up with a couple of West Virginia bloggers, and see all my old haunts. But, I was also thinking of every possible excuse not to go. Whenever I would check the reunion site to see if anyone had updated their information, I would cringe over a new reunion attendee I'd rather not see.

I really didn't enjoy high school. My transition from junior high to high school was horrendous. I left one school with many friends and entered the other 90 days later practically friend-less. Fickle female teenagers can be such heartless bitches. By the time I'd regained my footing and new friendships, it was my senior year and all I wanted then was to graduate and get the hell out of Dodge.

One of my fellow class of '90 mates suggested we get the "cool" people together for a separate reunion, that we ignore the official activities and do our own thing. I considered that for about 24 hours, even compiled a list and sent it to her, then I shut it down. That would have made us no better than those little pricks who had ignored us and made our lives miserable 20 years ago.

I realize that it's entirely possible that most of these people, with whom I spent my formative years, have changed for the better. It's also entirely possible that had the reunion happened, and had I attended, I would have been miserable.

I'm thinking about visiting my home state this fall, driving through the mountains during the peak of autumn color. When I do, I'll probably email that small group of Black Eagles I cared about and who made those three years a smidge easier. We may gather at a local restaurant, huddled over a yearbook, and recalling all those wonderful and horrible moments that made up our teen years. No hundreds of dollars spent on clothes we had to hire a trainer (or plastic surgeon) to make fit or sports cars we rented to make false impressions, all just to gather in an overpriced hotel ballroom with a dry chicken dinner. Instead, maybe we'll wear our best-worn jeans and reminisce over cheap cups of coffee, all the while flashing each other with pictures of our kids.

Maybe.

21 comments:

Dave2 said...

That was pretty much my latest reunion. We just weren't that close of a class.

Though if I thought there was a chance any of the ladies would be rocking their 80's hair for the event... I so totally would have interested!

Irrational Dad said...

My 10 year was canceled for the same reason. The fact is, I don't even REMEMBER people from my class. Honestly. I'm Faceboook "friends" with 20 or 30 of them, and barely remember the name, let alone have any real memories of them.

Having a horrible (horrible) memory really sucks.

Irrational Dad said...

AND... where the **** is NATUI?

Ashlie- Mommycosm said...

This kinda made me sad.
My 20th is next year and I'm psyched. I really enjoyed my high school experience. It was small town sitcom meets Dawson's Creek. I'm even friendly now with my high school nemesis b/c our kids are the same age and in school together. She's not so bad as an adult. Or maybe I'm more mature and don't resent the hawt mess she still is.

Next month, a group of about 20 of us are meeting at a restaurant to have drinks and catch up - we do it every summer and it's quite trippy. I have a lot of friends from college and beyond, but there's something warm and comfortable about my high school friends - kinda like those worn in jeans.

Michael from dadcation.com said...

I liked my 10th and figure the 20th will be fun, too. But, I was really close to my HS buds (and still am, for the most part). Sorry yours was canceled...I hope you do go back to WV and get together with the peeps you like!

Grant said...

I wasn't invited to the reunion of any of the high schools I attended for either the 10 or 20 year. I guess graduating didn't make me any more popular. It's a pity because I wanted to see who died. I hope the people I once knew have worms in their head and are currently on fire. Is there a 25 year reunion? I could show uninvited.

Megan said...

I didn't even know we were having a reunion until after it was over. I never got an invitation because they "couldn't find me."

Really? I didn't go far. I pass my old high school all the time.

I like your way better. :)

sybil law said...

And I thought MY class was bad! My reunion was... eh - hard to say - I was deathly ill the day before, and I only showed up to one event. By the time I got there, everyone was drunk and messy, so that was fun to see. Otherwise, I think reunions suck. I "see" everyone I want to see in real life, or on Facebook, anyway.

Anonymous said...

I only graduated high school four years ago, but I can honestly say that I probably won't go to my reunion, either. The people I actually made connections with I still talk to, while everyone else? I don't. I didn't really care about 95% of my high school class, and don't think a reunion would be up my alley. Now, hanging out with those people I did connect with? That would be nice.

Expat No. 3699 said...

My 30 year reunion is at the end of August. That being said, I'm not planning on going. I'm still in touch with the people I want to be and the others can go suck it...

...plus the ones planning it are obviously in denial of being almost 50 because they're having it at a forest preserve that all the 'burn-outs' hung out at back in the day. Uhm, yeah, tacky not retro.

Miss Britt said...

I missed my 10 year because we'd just had to run home unexpectedly for the tornado a few weeks earlier. Both Jared and I had planned to go, though.

I'm looking forward to the 20th.

But I won't buy new clothes or hire a personal trainer or rent a car. I'll just go to remind myself where we came from, because that's still important to us.

But maybe we're weird like that. :-)

hello haha narf said...

i went to a huge high school and loved it. LOVED high school.
but i have no desire to go back. i attended one reunion (10th) because one of my best friends (we were roommates) wanted desperately to go and begged me to join her. while i suppose i could call it fun, there is a reason i am not still friends with the majority of the people i saw there. sure, they might be wonderful people, but i'm not still in high school. if we were meant to be tight today the friendships would have lasted. i mean i did attend with someone i have known since about 1st grade so clearly i can maintain a long relationship, but i don't feel that my life is any worse for not still being friends with all of the folks i saw at the 10th. so i didn't go to the 20th. had zero desire.

BUT BACK TO YOU...you don't need a trainer or botox or a new car or any of that other shit you mentioned. you are one of the most incredible women i know and those of us who have the pleasure of being in your life are honored to do so. don't sweat not wanting to live in the past. carpe that fucking diem.

xoxo

hello haha narf said...

forgot to add that you look so happy in your senior photo. the hair absolutely slayed me, but i was still drawn to what looks like true enjoyment on your face. it surprised me to read that you hated high school. especially when as much as i adored high school my photo looks like i was quite unhappy. interesting...

metalmom said...

I went to my tenth and it was okay. I noticed that everyone split up into the grade school groups.

I went to my twentieth and the same thing happened. More people went to that one but I think it was mostly to see if two particular celebrities showed up.

I won't go to my next reunion. I have discovered that the only people I WANT to see, are my grade school chums and we have so much fun welcoming the newly-found every other month or so.

Patois42 said...

I haven't been to any reunions -- and there have been plenty. I just can't fake the interest.

Shelli said...

My 25 year is this weekend. My husband and I aren't going. (We were high school sweethearts, so we graduated the same year from the same school.) It's too expensive. Just not in the budget and we don't even have to travel to anyplace other than a hotel downtown. Still. I wouldn't mind seeing some people, but I'll live without it.

Jason, as himself said...

Yep. Our 20th wasn't canceled, but I had a lack of interest, too. Sure, there are a few people I would have been okay seeing, but not really worth the whole thing to me.

I'm sure I was a hot topic of conversation at the reunion, though!

Lynda said...

I think Facebook has killed high school reunions. I am friends with a lot of my peers on Facebook. Honestly, I don't really feel the need to attend one.

Lynda said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
marty said...

I attended my 25th High School Reunion. You might find this surprising but I was not one of the more popular kids in school. So, for the reunion, I was on my best behavior being civil (and not sarcastic). Nothing changed for me.
I was going to give a classmate's wife a business card and she wouldn't take it. She acted like I was giving her dog shit. Not going to the next one.

tracey.becker1@gmail.com said...

Do it. Meet up with the ones you cared about. I haven't regretted any reunion I've ever attended. Especially when I was able to be a GROWN-UP and be kind and polite to the people that got ignored in high school. I was never mean, but I wasn't always as inclusive as I should have been. It felt good to be able to rectify that nagging guilt, even if only a little bit.