For the Hell of it, I Googled my first and last name last week. And this is what I found on WikiAnswers (poor spelling and grammar left in place because, well, it's just awesome):
Question: Is heather dumbass* a lesbion trany part chicken alien?
Answer: Yes she oncetook me up 2 her spaceship and herpart roostermom and dad raped my parent whilst her an herbrother chased me round the giant spaceship barn with sex whips an fluffy hand-cufs and botllesof chiken hormnes
I. Shit. You. Not.
So, you've now been warned. I'm a lesbion (not lesbian, mind you) trany part chicken alien.
Pardon me while I go chase the neighbors with "botllesof chiken hormnes."
*Not my real last name. Well, on some days it is.