20 January 2009

It's Up To Me To Stay Drug Free

I've mentioned a couple of times on this blog that I'm a Libertarian. In a nutshell, Libertarians are for a smaller federal government, less taxes, and more personal freedoms. Whatever your personal political beliefs, there are typically two things about Libertarians that scare most people off from the party. They are:

1) Libertarians are just peachy about the legalization of all currently illicit/illegal drugs.
2) Libertarians are honky-dory with the legalization of prostitution.

Now, I'm not posting this to start a political bru-ha-ha on the day of the inauguration of our 44th president. I'm not posting this to start a You wanna turn my baby into a drug addict/sex fiend! argument. Nope. I'm posting this to show you this e-mail I received last week:

Hello,

Recently I visited your website http://coalminersgd.blogspot.com; while visiting your site I noticed that you link to http://www.reason.com at this address: http://coalminersgd.blogspot.com/. As we are closely related to them, I would love to exchange links with your website, currently there are about 5,000 - 7,000 people per day that goto my site and search for information, Therefore I would to link to an excellent site like yours.

I have taken the liberty of adding your site to my home page: http://www.rollitup.org to determine if it is of any benefit to you, if you have a stats program you can check it and let me know. By looking at my stats, it looks like today I have sent you 38 visitors but it may change by the time you receive this email.

Some website owners do not like when other sites link to them so I thought I might ask first. I think the information on your website could be useful to my visitors; and maybe you could receive some extra relevant traffic if you want. Please get back to me when you have a chance to let me know if its ok to link to your website like this.

Have a good week,

Mark Thompson

Yup. All you other bloggers? Getting offers of free schwag to review for your site? Getting linked by other bloggers? Whatev. I'm now linked from a forum that allows you to talk to other marijuana users on how to set up a grow room for your ganja, how to get your Mary Jane plants healthy, how to harvest and cure your herbs, and even a place to post pictures of your, ah-hem, weed.

So, here is my formal response:

Dear Mark,
I really appreciate that you visited my humble corner of the PRB and that you found my blog amusing enough to link to from your site. But, even though I'm a Libertarian, I don't exclusively write about Libertarian ideals or politics in general. Some other things you should know about me:

- I've taken one puff off of one cigarette. Ever. I brushed my teeth for five solid hours after that.
- I've smoked 10 cigars in my lifetime and, ironically, did not feel the need to brush my teeth after each one. The one Cuban cigar did make me nauseous.
- I've been drunk approximately six times in my lifetime, all after the age of 21. So, even my drunks have been legal.
- I've never smoked marijuana. I inhaled enough second-hand marijuana smoke at a Jimmy Buffett concert nine years ago that I'm sure about 1/16th of my brain was affected. But personally lighting up a joint? No.
- I've never done any of the following: crystal meth, cocaine, LSD, PCP, crack, mushrooms (unless you count the portabello 'shrooms in my chicken concoction I ate the other night), ecstasy, etc.
- I did try GHB during a really idiotic period in my life in which I believed an asshole-friend of mine who claimed it would help me during my marathon training. I no longer participate in the use of GHB because I would like to be awake for my life. Oh, and alive.

Now, having illustrated to you that I am very far off the beaten path from your audience, I hope you continue to find entertainment here in my little corner. And thanks for the link. I'm pretty sure your audience will stop by and promptly run away screaming when all they find is a drug-free mommy blogger who free-bases Godiva chocolate.

Sincerely,
Heather

Now, if I could just get the Moonlite Bunny Ranch to link to me, my life would be complete.

18 comments:

Violet said...

Laughing. My. Ass. Off.

Molly's Mom said...

Wow. Just wow. And hysterical laughter.

Patois said...

That's too hilarious.

metalmom said...

Drug-free mommy blogger? Shit! I thought this was a recipe exchange!

That guy was such a tool.

Turnbaby said...

Best. Response. Ever.

Avitable said...

You can be pro-drug legalization and be drug free!

Gypsy said...

That was hilarious.

And I read your last line about the Moonlight Bunny Ranch and got a little shiver of anticipation because how cool would that be??

Tell the rollitup people to come my way. ;)

Trukindog said...

"Legalized Prostitution"
Yeah see that's why I don't live in Nevada...gamblings no problem but prostitution would have me homeless in no time. ;)

Vulgar Wizard said...

OMG, I'm related to Mark Thompson!!!! *gasp*

Not Afraid to Use It said...

I'm with Avitable. And I agree it was an excellent response. In Nevada I was lucky enough to be able to vote on the legalisation of MJ.

HEATHER said...

Too funny!

sybil law said...

Hahahahahahahah
You don't smoke reefer? Now I am utterly confused! ;)

A Free Man said...

That's what happens when you hang out with libertarians...

;)

Coal Miner's Granddaughter said...

Violet - Glad I could help you, hon. :)

Molly's Mom - Hee hee!

Patois - Isn't it?

MetalMom - Dude. If this is a recipe exchange, I'm so friggin' behind...

Turnbaby - Thanks!

Avitable - My point!

Gypsy - Oh, it would be so friggin' cool if Dennis Hof would link to me. :)

Trukindog - HA!

Vulgar Wizard - Seriously?

NATUI - Sweet!

Other Heather - I thought so, too.

Sybil Law - If did smoke the ganja, this blog would be sooooo screwed up!

A Free Man - Hee hee!

Father Muskrat said...

I agree with your leanings and your stance here!

Coal Miner's Granddaughter said...

Father Muskrat - It's always good to have fellow Libertarians at my six!

Jenny, the Bloggess said...

Stop bogarting the godiva.

Coal Miner's Granddaughter said...

Jenny, the Bloggess - Dude. You're still reading this drivel? :) And I'll quit hogging the Godiva when the husband quits buying it for me. Hopefully never.