People, It's a Sunday

Burt is such a slave-driver. Here it is. Sunday. I don't post on Sundays. Unless said Sunday is the 28th of the month. Then I'm over at Burt's place.

And he's such a jerk! I never get a vacation. I never get a break. Raises? Shu. He's never heard of that. Schmuck.

So, I'm over there. And it's lame because it's the first Sunday after Christmas. So, go and heckle.

Thanks.

Friday Mustache

Yep. It's my day at the 'Stache.

Don't worry. It's a very short, sweet, and to the point post.

You'll have plenty of time to make that 4AM sale at Kohl's.

Burt thinks you're an idiot for getting up that early.

Burt is also pissed that his turn as Boss Hogg in the big-screen version of The Dukes of Hazzard didn't even touch the iconic performance and sheer brilliance of Sorrell Booke's origination of said role in the TV series. Ignore Burt. He's bitter.

So, get on over there. This has gone on too long already.

Just-a 'Stachin'

Yo, peeps. It's October 28th. You know what that means.

- It's three days to Halloween.
- It's six days to the election.
- It's my day over at Burt Reynolds' Mustache.

You heard me. Get on over there. 'Cause I sure as hell ain't here!

Get on over there, please?

Well, I'm finally feeling back to my old, odd self. And it turns out that today is my day over at Burt's 'Stache. You may want to check it out. I have some news!

Well, it isn't really cool or exciting news. It's kind of lame, actually. Ty-man will probably smack me when he finds out. "Whaddaya think yer doin' takin' that crap on!?! Looney toons!"

Prob'ly.

It's Burt's Turn

OK, since I had the decency to cover up Burt's nekid butt, could you repay the favor and check me out over at the 'Stache today? I'm actually funny.

Really.

Well, I mean, I cracked myself up when I wrote it. That's got to mean something, right?

You're right. Probably not.

Oh, well.

Silent Saturday 3: Burt's 'Stache

Speechless?

Me too.

All I can say is click here. I'm not so silent over there.

Burt Kidnapped Me!

Well, not really. I'm actually in Antigua.

I'm sipping a fruity drink, hiding my pot belly in a one-piece, crisping my skin, and checking out the package on that... HELLO!

Whew. Anyhoo. As far as the blog-verse is concerned, I'm getting a little Burt nookie today. Check it out!

That Time of the Month

No, not that time of the month.

That time of the month.

Thank gawd Burt has nothing to do with me being a bitch once a month.

But he'd damn-well better bring me some chocolate. I'm just sayin'

Dear God in Heaven.

I am sick.

And tired.

Of constantly reminding all of you.

That on the 28^th of every. Damned. Month.

I'm there.

Not here.

I'm also tired of typing like William Shatner talks. Now, just go. Click on Burt. Please? I'm begging you.

Oh, Please.

Really? I mean, I don't know why I'm surprised.

Can't get it through your thick skulls that I'm never here on the 28th of each month.

I'm over there, at Burt's 'Stache. The 'Stache tickles. The 'Stache rules. We must obey the 'Stache.

So get there. Click on Burt. Seriously.

If you don't, he'll get pissed. And I don't think we want a pissed off Burt Reynolds, do we?

Good Lord...

Have you learned nothing? What's today's date? That's right, it's the 28th. And what happens on the 28th of every month? I take over Burt Reynolds' Mustache. I mean, hello? This is my third post over there! Haven't you figured it out, yet? Just go. Seriously. You're wearing. Me. Out.

Click on Burt. Now. You'll be glad you did.

You Want Some of This?

Not posting here today, people! You want a piece of me, click on Burt there to the left. He'll take you on over to Burt Reynolds' Mustache where you can check out my first-ever post on said blog. I'll be there the 28th of every month. Get moving! Go! Now!