03 January 2008

Caucus, Schmaucus

OK, yes, you guessed it. This is a politically-charged post. But, trust me. You'll snicker through most of it.

Politics are important to me. My Republican mother worked the polls in West Virginia during every election. My Democrat father read the papers and stayed informed. I vote in each and every election and I stay current on candidates and their views. I don't vote for a person because of their party affiliations or because Oprah tells me to. I vote based on how that candidate's ideas and political beliefs can better my life as a tax-paying American.

So, of course, I've got the news on, running in the background. Unless you've just crawled out of a hole, were born yesterday, or have time-traveled back to 2008, from an apocalyptic future, to save John Connor from Arnold Schwarzenegger (whew!), you should know that today is the Iowa caucus. Everyone is a-flutter. Who will win? Who will drop out? Who will the drop-outs endorse? Lions and tigers and bears, oh my!

So, I'm having my morning mug of joe, watching on-the-street interviews and I see/hear this:

Scene - Iowa bowling alley
Reporter: So, who are you voting for?
Woman: Hillary Clinton.
Reporter: Why?
Woman: I think it's time we had a woman in the White House.

Wait, wait. Back the bus up.

We're choosing our President based on candidates' sex organs?

Wha?

No, "Gee, I like her views on health care." or "Her ideas about fighting terrorism are swell." or even "I get warm and fuzzy when I read her policy regarding education."

Nothing.

This woman made her choice based on the fact that Hillary Clinton has a vagina rather than a penis.

Well. Damn.

If that's the case, let's just get rid of ALL the current candidates and replace them with porn stars. Because if this race is about genitalia, none of the current presidential candidates can measure up.

That we know of.....

Wow, did this post go pear-shaped or not?

11 comments:

Andrea said...

Dude! We can choose our candidates based on genetalia? I think they're posting the wrong pictures of themselves then!

Of course, now that I think about it, I don't think I want to see Giuliani's package... In fact, I don't think I want to see ANY of the current candidates' packages. Ew. And now I don't want to think about it anymore.

MilitaryMom said...

I agree 100%! I am strongly opinionated in this area, so please forgive me if I offend. I think that there are LOTS of people (women mostly) who will put ANY woman in the white house, just because they want to see a woman as president! I have a feeling that the single moms and democrats are about to make a mistake of mega-proportions in this election. Let's keep our fingers crossed that intelligence will prevail!

Avitable said...

Women are more logical, less likely to get into pissing contests, and are more devious.

I'd rather have a woman in the White House, too.

Teri said...

CAUC-us! It's just fun to say. Vote for Hillary because she has a CAUC-us!

Teri said...

Damn. I mean, vote for Hillary because she DOESN'T have a CAUC-us!

Crap. Nothing like ruining an already bad joke with technical inaccuracies.

Andrea said...

Teri, you crack me up!

Mr. Fabulous said...

In her defense, I myself make many decisions based on sex organs.

Oh, we got your card today. Mrs. Fab and I are delighted to be invited up for, as you say, "fun and games", but we are not actually into the swinger lifestyle...

Mr. Fabulous said...

Oh, and I have a post coming up regarding women in the white house So now Avitable AND you have taken to pre-empting me. Thank you very much!

Miss Britt said...

Unfortunately, there are just as many people who WON'T vote for her because she is a woman.

Which is really just as foolish as choosing someone because "they're a good Christian" or a "good husband" or a "nice guy".

People seem to forget you're electing a political leader - not choosing a fucking spouse.

Not Afraid to Use It said...

I agree with Miss Britt. Choose the person on how you think they will run the company, not how they run their household, their personal lives, or how they raise their children. Can you imagine if, when you were growing up, the state of your parents employment depended on your behaviour? Blech. Good post, Heather.

Teri said...

Aw, shucks. Thanks, Andrea. But are you laughing WITH me or AT me? ;-)