11 July 2008

100 Things - What You See Is What You Get

OK, this list of ten will bring our total count to 80. I hope in the next couple of weeks (or, knowing my track record, the next couple of months) to finish this list. Until then, please drink in

10 Things About the Physical Heather

1. I have PCOS. PCOS stands for Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome which means that instead of my ovaries creating follicles and expelling eggs out of said follicles once a month, my ovaries create follicles and the follicles become fluid-filled cysts with no eggs released. All of this is because I'm a borderline-diabetic. Yes, everyone, you are what you eat. Follow a poor diet? Suffer from infertility. You have been warned!

2. I am near-sighted. I have been since age 7. It's so much fun wearing glasses in the second grade. No matter how many times you reply to the bullies, Oh yeah? Well, four eyes are better than two! it just never sounds believable.

3. I only have one sesamoid bone under each big toe.

Normal people have two of those little sesamoid bones under each big toe. Not me. I'm a mutant. My podiatrist said so. Since I'm a mutant it must mean I have a superpower. I haven't figured it out yet, but I'll let you know when I do.

4. I have a ton of freckles. Everywhere. How every is everywhere? Well, that's for me to know and for you to wonder about. But trust me. They're all over the place.

5. I never had wisdom teeth. Don't ask me how I lucked out on that one, I just did. I haven't had to suffer through that particular agony and I hope I've passed that on to my kids!

6. My natural hair color is mousy brown. I started turning gray at 21. When my hair isn't colored on a regular basis, my brown is a non-exciting brown mixed with a bunch of gray. Therefore, mousy brown.

7. My left knee clicks when I go up and down stairs. I have no idea why. But it's got a good beat and you can dance to it.

8. I'm a 32D. Go figure. I had my first, proper bra fitting back in December and found out that what I thought were a couple of deflated 38Bs are in actuality 32Ds. All I can say is that if I'm a 32D, 99.9999999999% of the women in this country are wearing the wrong dang sized bras. Seriously.

9. The pores on my nose are huge. Seriously. You could drive a truck through them. Gigantic. Don't look too closely. Actually, I guess you could see them from far away so it doesn't matter.

10. My skin is very sensitive to the humidity of my environment. I may hate the summer heat, but the humidity keeps my skin in check. In the winter I use up gobs of lotion just to keep my skin livable.

Thanks for reading, guys! I'm back on Monday to the usual lunacy that is me. I'll finish this list at some point and when I do you'll learn about the ten things I want to teach my kids and the ten things I like about myself. Until then, toodles!


Not Afraid to Use It said...

The fact that you never had wisdom teeth just proves you are on the cutting edge of evolution, baby! I KNEW there was something special about you! Maybe that explains the foot thing, too?

And I'm proud of you for the whole giant pore thing. Most women (myself included) have them. Janine Garofalo said it best don't you think? About carrying change around in them? Love her!

Anonymous said...

You are so lucky that you don't have wisdom teeth. I was somewhat lucky by getting mine removed before they came in.

I'm with you on about half of the others though.

Hope you are having a great time!

RiverPoet said...

Okay, so how come you call yourself a mutant about the feet but not about the teeth? ;-)

How does the missing bone affect your foot? I assume since you have a podiatrist that there must be some drawback, right?

Love the lists!

Avitable said...

I actually think I left my truck in your pores. Can you bring it back sometime?

Expat No. 3699 said...

You are so lucky you didn't have to deal with wisdom teeth, and getting them pulled and 'dry socket', Ouch!

Can't wait until you find out what you're super power is.

Donna said...

Only one Sesamoid bone on your first metatarsal ... per foot? Gawd, you're so weird!

Here's a fun fact, the knee cap is a sesamoid bone.
I'm just full of fun factoids!

B said...

I'm lovin' your 100 things list. Hey, maybe your wisdom teeth got lost in your nose pores. My wisdom teeth never came in, but when I was about your age, the dentist decided to pull them all. Guess that's why I never gained much wisdom in all my years. I, too, though, have very large nose pores. I got them from my father, who also had extremely large tear ducts. Eewww - I hope I don't inherit those too.
Have a great weekend. :)

B said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Liz Hill said...

I still have my wisdom teeth---one has a filling ;-)

I have huge pores on my nose too--boo.

I am a 35 DD --I have 34DD and 36 D and DD bras

I have polycystic ovaries--I've had two burst in the last year and a half --big BOO

Molly's Mom said...

I must've gotten some of your wisdom teeth, b/c I had 6!
Want to hear something weird? I don't have freckles, but ALWAYS wanted them as a kid. I'd have died and gone to heaven if I could've had them.
And get down with your bad, funk-ay32D self! I hope you trumpeted that loudly to Ty! :)

Willie G said...

I HAD all my wisdom teeth. They just didn't stick around very long.

I'm sure all of those bullies are wearing glasses by now, if that makes you feel any better.

Coal Miner's Granddaughter said...

NATUI - Charles Darwin don't got shit on me, baby! And my pores? I think I actually might use them to carry around my tampons. What do you think?

Miss Night Owl - I always remember my mother in agony from her wisdom teeth.

Momma - The missing bones made my big toes ache when I was doing a lot of running. My podiatrist made me some special inserts for my running shoes and all was better! If I was missing both bones, my big toes would be curled under. Permanently. Ish.

Avitable - Nope. Possession is 9/10ths of the law. You're so screwed.

Employee #3699 - When I find out, I'll let you know! I hope it's invisibility. That would be so cool.

Donna - Serious weirdness.

B - HA! Teeth in my nose pores... too funny!

Turnbaby - Dude, you managed to keep one of your wisdom teeth? You must be one smart chicky! :)

Molly's Mom - Six? Wow. I'm sorry. You and mom were separated at birth. She would put band-aids on her face and lay out in the sun and hope to get a tan through the holes in the band-aids. Yeah. She got sunburned and covered with little, tiny, red dots. HA!

Willie G - Thanks, hon! That and they're probably bald. *Snort!*

Gypsy said...

My wisdom teeth came in, and they kept telling me I needed to have them out, but I just couldn't take the time out of school or work or whatever, and I never did it. Finally, the dentist said, "They've made a place for themselves and don't need to come out." Hah!

Coal Miner's Granddaughter said...

Gypsy - Lucky woman! Woo hoo! You're a mutant, too!

Susan said...

I just found your blog through ducksofhappiness and I think we may need to be best friends.
Not only am I from Georgia where you live now, I am also funny, like you are, and, best of all ... my knee clicks on stairs too. Every step. Click. Click. Click.
Sometimes my ankles chime in. Clickclick. Clickclick.

Coal Miner's Granddaughter said...

Susan - FINALLY! A fellow knee-clicker! We so need to get together and do the stair-master together! :)